


Sugary Stars on Midnight Blue

by Sugar_and_Salt



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M, Romance, Synesthesia, alternative universe, mild social anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-01-16
Packaged: 2018-09-18 00:22:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9353870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sugar_and_Salt/pseuds/Sugar_and_Salt
Summary: Chanyeol revels in the colors of words and the taste of the night sky. Jongin's name might just outshine the sky though.





	

**Author's Note:**

> ~crossposted from AFF (as usual)~
> 
> I really enjoyed writing this~  
> Another round of thanks goes to my wonderful beta Zene ♥
> 
> Love,  
> Sugar_and_Salt ♥
> 
>   
>  _♪ This fic was originally written for the[kaifectionaries  ](http://kaifectionery.livejournal.com/)♪_

  
  


2:34 AM.

Silent, silent night. A thick, black quilt muffling the daily hustle and bustle, putting out the flickering lights and relentless voices. This wasn't one of those city districts night owls would seek out to dance, drink, seek company and feel alive. High office buildings to every side made any passerby feel like an ant in the industrial field of grass, and the only signs of life were the occasional street lamps and a few lit windows.

Yes, it was late at night, and yet Chanyeol was wide awake.

"...and we're on standby. Hey, Chanyeol. Did you have your break yet?"

"Uh, no, not yet. But it's oka-"

"Well, now's a good time. Half an hour for you, got it?"

"Yessir!" Chanyeol replied with a playful salute and slid the tape into the pocket of his hoodie, getting up from where he'd been crouching on the floor. His knees made some nasty cracking sounds, but the lanky boy chose to ignore them as he padded out of the recording studio, both arms stretched over his head.

Around him, everything was brightly lit, and his gaze wandered down to the area below them. This particular studio allowed a great view on the cafeteria far below, as well as Seoul's skyline. Chanyeol was determined not to ever grow tired of it, so he held on to the metal railing and looked through the enormous glass wall and into the sea of artificial stars for a little longer. He reveled in the dark sweetness lingering on his tongue like a shadow, sour little dots of raspberry reminding him of the lights disturbing the peaceful night outside - and of his rumbling stomach.

Yes, food would actually be nice, considering that he hadn't eaten anything since dinner around five.

With one hand dancing over the rail, he took the perforated metal stairs, each step sending a bitter, resounding clank through the hall that was drowned in the ocean of vague noises.

Yes, the world was fast asleep but Chanyeol's surroundings weren't. Chanyeol worked in Seoul's biggest radio station, where day and night were factors mostly applying to the world outside their generous windows in the main area. Here, people were sleepy while others were wide awake, and a simple look to the watch wouldn't clear up anything.

Chanyeol was wide awake, and he loved it.

With a tune on his lips he helped himself at the buffet, squeezing a few pieces of sweet watermelon on the pile of cut apples in his dessert bowl. He purposefully ignored the bowl of peaches, which always sounded like a good, juicy and vibrant idea, but never turned out to live up to his expectations.

None of his colleagues were currently on break, and with a faint pout that turned into an optimistic shrug, Chanyeol sank into an empty seat in the back of the cafeteria, close to a lone brunet he saw occasionally.

He didn't work for the radio, so Chanyeol could only guess that he might be working for one of the other companies taking up what very little space the radio left them in the building. But he was strikingly handsome with his boyish curls in the color of dark chocolate and overall distinct features, and Chanyeol just really liked him, so a table close to him it was.

He still tried to resist the temptation of sneaking a glance at him (in order not to creep him out) as he poked around his chicken fricassee, picking at the thankfully few peas to eat them first. He had connected the dots long ago, and came to understand that most food he disliked were the ones where the  _ taste  _ didn't match the actual taste.

You see, Chanyeol was a very imaginative person, and his senses were much more adventurous than those of most people. While an empty glass might evoke nothing but eventual thirst in most people, Chanyeol would be struck by a sweet, mildly prickling taste. Yes, his senses always occupied the first row in his brain, just before reason and logic, telling him that ideas could have a taste, that emotions had colors and colors emotions.

Chanyeol had actually gotten a few odd looks because of it in the past, but at the end of the day, it was nothing but a harmless quirk. And Chanyeol lived at the end of the day, in this almost otherworldly place where he could silently enjoy the impressions that were so much more subdued and pleasant than the tidal wave drowning him during the day.

Like this, small impressions could get the attention they deserved, and it was easier to keep your head clear and stay focused.

He was just nibbling at his first slice of watermelon, savoring the first bite, when someone spoke up next to him.

"Yes? ...yeah. Yeah, so? What are you, my mother?"

It was the brunet boy who had taken a call, his phone pressed to his ear as he aimlessly swirled through the remnants of what Chanyeol assumed had once been hot chocolate. His voice was unexpectedly light, clashing with his overall sleepy look, and Chanyeol liked it, though he might be biased. Either way, Chanyeol couldn't  _ not  _ listen in on him.

"I get it. Did you call to scold me, Soo? You're up as well."

He didn't sound seriously angry, maybe a little exasperated. His friend's name was rich and dark, though not black. More like the color of dark grapes. He felt like a good person.

"Mhm," the brunet hummed, scraping the last bits of whipped cream from the walls of his cup, "I know. No, no one really cares. You know how it is. They're all like  _ Jongin do this _ -"

Chanyeol's hand froze midway, and a stray droplet of watermelon stained the table.

" _ Jongin do that _ , and at the end of the month they'll accuse me for the number of hours I worked overtime. Same old, same old, every damn month- huh? Oh, sure. Talk to you later." the brunet, no,  _ Jongin _ , said, sounding mildly put-off by the sudden end of the call. 

With a hum, he used his sleeve to clear the phone's screen and placed it on the table. The motion had him notice Chanyeol, who wasn't even trying to make a secret out of him staring anymore. No, he was completely turned towards him at this point, the dripping piece of watermelon slowly sinking back to the bowl. Brown eyes followed the movement, before giving Chanyeol a fleeting once-over. He looked confused and mildly weirded out, but Chanyeol barely noticed it, too occupied with repeating the boy’s name in his head over and over again.

Jongin. Jong-in.  _ Jongin _ .

There was something about it, something really striking, something he couldn't put his finger on, no matter how hard he tried. The longer he tried, the more the memory of his name faded, and finally, Chanyeol blinked and focused on the boy, curiosity speaking before his brain was able to catch up with it.

"Can you repeat that? Your name, I mean?"

The boy scrunched his eyebrows together, reflexively letting him know that he did find him weird.

"Uhm. What? Excuse me?" he asked, obvious caution blooming on his face. Chanyeol licked his lips and mentally back-pedaled, trying to save the situation.

"Just. I'm not weird, it's just that your name tastes- is interesting," he hastily corrected himself.

The boy still stared, not unlike a frightened animal. Chanyeol wanted to facepalm.

_ Your name tastes interesting _ . What a wonderful way to scare someone off.

"My name tastes interesting," the boy repeated in a monotone voice, looking conflicted between judging him or running off. Chanyeol wanted to whine in frustration - this was the first time the boy he'd had his eye on for forever actually noticed him, and he had to ruin it like this. But while the night might be a time of the day where people typically got lazy, emotional and gave up easily, Chanyeol  
was wide awake and quick to react. So he jumped to his feet, and quickly stepped around to the other's table (who actually flinched), just to come to a sudden stop before him.

"Can you give me a chance to explain? I swear I can explain it. Please just listen to me?"  
The look in his eyes clearly told Chanyeol he wasn't thrilled, but he gave him a vague nod anyways, and he sank into the seat opposite of him.

He'd never been that close to his long term not-quite-crush, and for a second, Chanyeol was distracted by the way he looked. His appearance definitely looked less flawless than from afar. Instead of seeing someone who is just 'handsome', he could now get a closer look on the slope of his nose, the fine brows giving him an almost naturally innocent look. His lips looked just as plush and inviting -if not more so- from this distance.

And his eyes were kind of twinkling, too, as the regarded him warily-

"So...?"

Oh. Right.

"Uhm. I didn't mean to sound creepy. It's just that to me, most words have a specific  _ feel  _ or taste to them," he started off slowly, watching the boy's expression go from mostly freaked out to... still mostly freaked out, but mildly curious.

"I'm not crazy, promise. There's even a name for this-"

"Like how?" Jongin cut him off, and now that Chanyeol wasn't busy taking in his features, he noticed how smooth Jongin’s voice was. Not as deep as his, but melodious and pleasant to the ear.

"Like how..." Chanyeol repeated, fingers softly drumming on the table as he looked around for a good example. His eyes were drawn to the high windows.

"The word  _ window _ , for example, tastes rather bland, but slightly salty. Just a little."

The look on the other's face told him to continue, so he did.

"Or  _ computer _ .  _ Computer  _ tastes a little like licorice."

A grimace tugged at plush lips.

"Eww."

"I know, I don't really like licorice either," Chanyeol hummed in shared sentiment, "but it's a neutral word, so it's alright."

"So... what's so special about my name?" he prodded, looking just a little more curious than weirded out now.

Chanyeol hesitated.

"Your name... can you say it again?"

"Jongin."

_ Jongin _ . It felt like licking the spoon he'd previously dipped into a complex dessert - a flurry of sweet tastes, all rushing by and escaping his grasp as quickly as they'd come.

"It tastes like... I'm not sure. Like something sweet? It's definitely nice though."

Jongin looked unsure of whether to feel flattered about this. Either way, he actually smiled a little.

"And what's your name?"

 

* * *

  
  


After that, Chanyeol rarely forgot about his breaks anymore. On most days, he skipped down the metal staircase with misplaced, premature enthusiasm, only to either eat alone or with working colleagues. Sure, it wasn't very likely that he and the beautiful brunet from the upper stories had their break at the same time.

But sometimes, just sometimes... he was lucky.

"So, uhm. How does it work, with the tastes? If you don't mind me asking," Jongin added quickly, poking around his casserole. Chanyeol had quickly learned that the other was... not much of a people person. The first few times he had found him in the cafeteria after that, Jongin had even pointedly glanced away from him and down to his food. Chanyeol was of a merry nature though, and didn't feel rejected that easily - he simply sauntered over to him, not without knocking his ankle on at least one metal leg of a chair or table, and sank into the seat across him.

Now it wasn't in his intention to socially pressure Jongin into liking him - but to him, Jongin didn't seem inherently annoyed by his presence. He didn't initiate anything, not even weeks later, when he at least shot him a small smile of recognition across the dining area. He'd just sit there, leaving any further advances to Chanyeol.

On the rare occasions that had Jongin enter after him, he'd always wait for Chanyeol to adamantly wave him over. It was mostly him doing all the talking, too, but it was alright; Chanyeol didn't mind any of this. Not as long as Jongin sought his eyes like he did now - with interest peeking out from a heavy blanket of shyness.

"Of course I don't mind. It's okay!" Chanyeol reassured him, fishing for one of the sparse little meatballs in his soup. His break didn't last forever, after all.

"Most people are very focused on one category. It's commonly colors, but my brain is a little more messy than that," he said with a lighthearted chuckle that seemed to infect Jongin just a little bit.

"To me, it's mainly about tastes. I do occasionally associate colors, too, sometimes even feelings. But it's all sporadic and vague. Yeah, it's mostly tastes."

"And it works for every word?"

Jongin seemed hesitant, but Chanyeol wasn't exactly making a secret out of this, and had explained it to people before, so he had the answer ready.

"Yeah. But to be honest, names are... stronger? They have a more intense taste, that kind of influences your opinion on someone? Occasionally, I meet people whose names taste just awful. And no matter how they behave, I can never quite shake off this bitter taste, you know?"

Jongin nodded vaguely, obviously trying hard to get behind this concept.

"Because it's like a gut feeling?"

Chanyeol hummed around another spoon of soup, trying hard not to eat too messily in front of the other. "Yes. I mean, there is no scientific proof, but it could very well be an unconscious gut feeling playing into it. Whoever would be able to proof that?"

Jongin nodded as he finally took a bite of his food. For a few seconds, they ate in silence. Shutting Chanyeol up wasn't easy, but food definitely had the rare potential to do so. Not to mention that Jongin seemed to chew on more than food. Whenever he was not attentively listening, he seemed to be lost in thoughts, and Chanyeol would be a liar to say he wasn't curious about what was going on in that sweet boy.

"So what about your own name?"

Chanyeol was startled out of his own thoughts, and had nothing to offer but an unintelligent hum. Jongin orderly chewed his food and swallowed, before repeating the question.

"What does your own name feel like?"

_ Oh _ .

"It's a little weak regarding my own name, cause I hear it all the time and just associate it with myself by now. It just feels neutral, but... it's red," he stated earnestly.

"Red?"

"Yeah. Probably because it tastes like tomatoes."

Jongin actually snorted, a crack in the polished coat of icing, revealing the actual cake beneath. But what type of a cake was it? The taste was so familiar-

"Really now?"

Chanyeol couldn't help laughing himself, all other thoughts temporarily blown away. It was probably the way Jongin's eyes crinkled when he laughed.

 

* * *

  
  


There was no denying it - his lunch break had become the most thrilling part of Chanyeol's day by now. It wasn't exactly a splash of color in his otherwise bleak life. He would never consider his life bleak. Maybe Jongin was the only patch of subdued colors in the chaotic swirl that was his life. A drop of velvet tranquility in an unsettled ocean.

Maybe he was growing too attached already, but soon Chanyeol picked up the habit of coming to work half an hour earlier, and staying even after his shift ended.  _ It's not a big deal _ , he told himself. Whether he was at home or in the brightly lit, wide awake world of the radio station, barely made a difference. Sure, it was a little noisy - but with his favorite set of headphones on, Chanyeol could leisurely work a little on private projects, nestled in a corner of the dining area. It was much better than falling to bed right after work, and attempting to squeeze in the work some other time; the day had only so many hours.

Today, he was a little unlucky, it seemed. He'd slept badly and while he made it a point to still show up earlier, he was now barely able to keep his eyes open. Also, Jongin was nowhere in sight.

Chanyeol sleepily looked around the area for awhile, eyes grazing the many heads and taking in the grainy noise.

Well, he could still nap a little. Just until his shift started. Burying his face on his arms he tuned out the cacophony of noise to concentrate on the soft, tantalizing voice seeping through his headphones. It filled his mind with a clean, clear shade and the taste of vanilla, drowning out the mess around him. As much as Chanyeol liked the amount of input his environment gave him, sometimes it felt so good to just take a rest.

He was drifting somewhere between darkness and awareness, when something tugged at his consciousness. Literally tugged? No, it didn't hurt. But there were fingers in his hair, carding through it in soft strokes. His first instinct was to move, but he stopped himself at the last second. Sure, this could be any of his working colleagues playing a trick on him. But this... was going on for way too long. Most of his friends would be cooing or tugging or otherwise trying to rouse him. This didn't feel like someone trying to wake him up though - quite the opposite, even. The movements were gentle, careful even. Whenever a strand of his messy, white hair showed resistance, they'd slow down even more and avoid the little knot altogether, if it wouldn't budge.

This wasn't just anyone. It was Jongin.

Cautious, shy Jongin was petting his hair and massaging his scalp. It was odd, to feel this sensation while his senses were filled to the brim with vanilla. There was just a sea of creamy colors and caresses that felt more intimate than they maybe should. He wouldn't have expected Jongin to come forward like this, but now that he did, teasing him about it (or asking for him to please never stop) was not an option.

Because there was a reason for Jongin to even be here, to be awake when his whole company was asleep. To bustle between deserted islands of his office every night, socks padding over worn out carpet, towards the lonely light that was his cubicle. Jongin couldn't handle people all that well. Though Chanyeol liked to think that people couldn't handle Jongin well. The web designer had told him that he felt awkward among them, that he preferred to work alone and that he was lucky the circumstances allowed it.

And he really did seem content with the way it was. Just sometimes, when Jongin got comfortable in between fennel tea and velvety words being exchanged over the plastic table, he'd show glimpses of loneliness. As if a tiny part of him would like it to be different. Chanyeol couldn't help but wonder what Jongin's life was like, outside this radio station. Or outside this dining room, at least.

To be very honest, Chanyeol was not a patient person. He was someone who rushed things, eager to see progress and achieve his goals. But with Jongin, there was no rush. Not only because it would scare him off, but also because he felt no need to. Just taking a break like this was alright - with his head buried in his arms, ignoring the strain on his neck, he just felt the pads of Jongin's fingers rub aimless swirls into his scalp, and the moment was too precious to rush and break it.

Only later, when Chanyeol's bitter alarm went off and recklessly shattered the moment, and when Chanyeol took off his headphones, greeting Jongin like nothing had happened, did he notice it.

Whenever the memory of Jongin's name began to fade, it left this distinct aftertaste matching the music he'd been listening to. Vanilla.

 

* * *

  
Despite what others might think of a loudmouth like Chanyeol, he wasn't an insensitive person. Rather, he might be occasionally, but never on purpose. If he knew where the line was, he respected that. So when one day two of his co-workers joined him for dinner, he didn't lead them to Jongin's table at the far corner of the room. It wasn't like he refused to acknowledge him, he just had to let him have a choice. So he chose a table nearby, shushed one of his two friends who was already craning his neck for the brunet - because Chanyeol's dinner dates were far from being a secret among the radio staff anymore - and simply shot Jongin an encouraging smile. 

While Baekhyun, the excitable and ever-chipper radio host kept rambling about an upcoming show, Chanyeol kept seeking out Jongin whenever he dared. The boy seemed torn. On one hand he was obviously relieved that Chanyeol hadn't brought the two to his table, on the other Chanyeol had offered for him to join them, was doing it right now with a subtle nod. He could see Jongin wringing his hands on the table, eyes flitting between them and his food. The next time Chanyeol looked at him, his gaze was met with one of slight helplessness. Oh. Maybe he didn't know how to approach them, especially now that the initial chance was gone.

Chanyeol wasn't unaware of the concept of awkwardness, though his receptors for embarrassment obviously kicked in later than Jongin's. With an easy grin, he took his tablet, announced he'd get dessert, and with the sweet demands following after him, he headed towards Jongin's table first.

"Hey."

The brunet wore a small, sheepish grin. "Hey," he echoed, eyes unconsciously seeking out the two people behind him. Chanyeol just prayed that Baekhyun wasn't staring at them right now.

"Do you want to sit with us?" he asked straight-forward, but not unkindly.

"If that's okay with you... sure," Jongin muttered, though he looked thoroughly anxious at the thought. With a reassuring smile on his lips, he led Jongin to the counter, choosing desserts for him and his co-workers, before returning and smoothly introducing him to the other two, stating that he'd  _ just  _ seen that Jongin was around, too.

Said brunet was evidently grateful for Chanyeol sparing him from awkward introductions as he sank into the seat next to him.

"This are Baekhyun and Yixing," Chanyeol introduced as he handed out the small glass bowls of pudding and fruits, "they are both hosts at our radio station."

"Hey there. You probably heard of me before," Baekhyun graciously said, eyes twinkling as usual. Baekhyun was one of their most popular hosts, mostly due to his uncanny ability to work on a tough schedule with shifts wildly splattered around the clock. Sometimes Chanyeol suspected that the taste of his name would change into something bitter eventually, because this young man was surely held together by nothing but obscene amounts of caffeine.

"Uhm. Maybe? I don't really listen to the radio at night..." Jongin mumbled. Yixing, who was beside him, huffed out a quiet laugh laugh seeing the look of incredulity on Baekhyun’s face.

"It's alright. You're working, right? Sometimes, music can be distracting."  
Chanyeol was glad to have Yixing at the table. Soft-spoken, calm Yixing who purely hosted shows between midnight and dawn.

To his surprise, Jongin actually perked up at this.

"Your voice seems a little familiar though. I-I might be wrong-" he began, stumbling a little as the attention was turned to him, "but sometimes there is a host reading messages and stories from readers at night, with this guitar sounds in the background-"

"That's totally him!" Chanyeol agreed excitedly, dessert forgotten before he'd even tasted it. "You didn't recognize him because he goes under the name Lay!"

While Baekhyun made a very offended sound, Yixing smiled softly.

"I'm always honored to meet a listener."

"Why do you know  _ him _ , and not me? I also record during the day? Hello?" Baekhyun demanded, and Chanyeol felt a hand land on his thigh, grabbing it. He flinched so hard he almost fell off the bench, but caught himself quickly. Discreetly, he reached for Jongin's hand (that had retreated immediately) and placed it back on his thigh. Baekhyun had been so caught up in listing all the reasons why Jongin should obviously be his fan, that he hadn't even judged Chanyeol for being noisy. Yixing shot him an unreadable look, but he trusted him not to mention anything.

"I just," Jongin began quietly, already reverting to holding on to Chanyeol, "I just sometimes listen to the radio on my way home, in the car. It's mostly La- Yixing hosting around that time. It's soothing to listen to someone read stories. I used to listen on my breaks, too."

_ Used to _ . Until instead of the radio, Chanyeol had started talking, talking  _ to  _ him.

Baekhyun pouted, but didn't keep up the accusing tone and saw it as a chance to complain about his schedule in general, which seemed to genuinely soothe Jongin, judging by the decreasing pressure on Chanyeol’s thigh.

"Anyway,  _ Jongin _ ," Baekhyun suddenly chirped, jumping around topics as usual and pulling the poor brunet back into the center of attention. "So what do you taste like?"

"E-excuse me?"

Even Yixing bit his lips to keep in a grin (because Chanyeol knew that Yixing wasn't even remotely innocent, despite his demeanor), and Jongin just spluttered, a palm flying to his face, absently checking whether he'd made a mess of himself. Chanyeol placed his spoon aside with a resounding clank and urged him on to drink something.

"Not like that - this was a perfectly non-sexual statement, don't make this weird," Baekhyun complained with a roll of his eyes while stuffing his face with the dessert, uncaring of the unattractive way the jam stuck to his lips. "At least not weirder than Chanyeol usually is. Did you know that he always tastes words? Did he never tell you? Chanyeollie, what does his name taste like for you?"

Chanyeol shrugged, much to the displeasure of the ever-curious Baekhyun.

"Come on. Come ooon. This is not fair. Is it something unpleasant? Jongin, if he tells you your name is weird, don't listen to him," he suddenly said in an almost conspiratorial tone, always eager to team up against Chanyeol, "he's probably lying. He used to tell me that my name tastes like bacon."

Jongin actually snorted at that, a curious 'really?' on his lips. Seeing the minuscule display of relaxation, Chanyeol took the bait.

"How do you know I didn't take it back just so you'd stop nagging? Besides, your name sounds way too similar to bacon, it's really hard to shake it off, okay?"

"You said I taste like honey melon! He did, didn't he?" Baekhyun protested loudly, looking around the table for confirmation, as if Jongin would know. As if he was a part of them already.

"You can't take that back anymore!"

"But it has a salty tang still," Chanyeol retorted with a stuck out tongue, before grabbing his spoon again.

"Well, well, no reason to be frustrated," Yixing threw in with a hand on Baekhyun's upper arm, "isn't that an Italian aperitif? Melon and bacon?"

Baekhyun sank back into his chair immediately, though it would remain a mystery whether it were the soothing words or the gesture having the bigger impact on him.

"So I'm exquisite, huh? I can work with that."

"What does Yixing's name taste like?" Jongin piped up surprisingly, and Chanyeol paused yet again, with the spoon halfway to his mouth.

"Yixing? Yixing tastes like... hot, lemon-flavoured tea."

Jongin nodded to himself as if this information was precious, and Chanyeol finally got a taste of the pudding he'd gotten himself. It tasted good, less intense like vanilla, sprinkled with chocolate chips and a sauce that-

"Okay, but what do you do, Jongin? You're from Electronic Dreams upstairs, right?"

A sauce that was sweet, thick, intensely fruity, and tasted just like Jongin. Jongin had a rather dark, alluring taste to himself, and maybe it was due to those sour berries slumbering beneath a blanket of vanilla and something else. Chanyeol dipped the teaspoon into the sauce, completely disregarding the flurry of input around him. The sauce was rather sour, a little too intense like this. But it was definitely the same taste.

_ Jongin _ . Something soft, something sour, a distinct aftertaste.

 

* * *

  
  


Chanyeol had been way too excited when Jongin shared his phone number with him, initially so Chanyeol could tell him when he'd go on break. He really tried to hold back on the texting, but more often than not he'd suddenly look at a number of digital speech bubbles he'd filled with random photos and thoughts during the day. Jongin did reply, and to his surprise, he was a rather passionate conversation partner who loved typing smiley faces and reply with pictures of his own. Maybe it was the magic of not being confronted face to face - Jongin had mentioned that he liked to chat with his friends from high school still. Instead of being taken aback, Chanyeol took it with glee - though he still hoped that one day, Jongin would be as open in person as he was via texts.

There was a surprising edge to him; Jongin really wasn't just sweet and vanilla. He could be stubborn when things didn't go as he'd planned, annoyed at noisy neighbors and relatives, too lazy to care about cleaning his house. Seeing all this shades of his personality made Chanyeol only want to get even closer. He also really wished he could stop thinking back to Jongin petting his hair while assuming him asleep. Because he was doing just that while snuggling into his blankets in the early morning hours. After such a long shift, it was hard not to see the shadows of cables and pins ghosting in front of his inner eye, and thinking of Jongin was helping him to calm down, to find some peace. But still - thinking about him while drifting off to sleep could lead to odd dreams, to surreal, thick sweetness dripping down in time-lapse-

His phone vibrated, brutally ripping Chanyeol out of his wandering thoughts. With a groan on his lips he blindly reached for it, aiming to mute it in order to get some sleep, when he saw Jongin's name on the screen.

_ Do you ever feel pressured just by people being around? _

Scrunching his brows, Chanyeol unlocked the phone and snuggled back into the cushions, looking up at the screen saying that Jongin was still typing. He didn't have to wait long.

_ Like it constricts your lung and your muscles are really stiff and you feel this irrational fear and uneasiness?  
And you just really wanna leave and be alone? _   
  
More typing followed, and as much as Chanyeol wanted to reply and start bombarding him with questions, something told him to wait.   
  
__ I don't know why  
But I really hate that they're all looking at me  
I wish people would just not look at me at all...

There was a short pause. Chanyeol thought about it. No, he didn't know that feeling. He really didn't. His fingers were halfway through typing the question of what happened, when more messages piled up.

 __I'm sorry  
I'm rambling. I'm just at work, gotta check on some projects with people, and I'm just waiting for that one person to arrive  
I'm just a little tired.  
Don't mind me

 _'It's okay!'_ Chanyeol replied, finally breaking the chain of profuse apologies. Even trying to imagine what Jongin must feel like was hard. But he couldn't deny the ugly little spark of happiness that Jongin would turn towards him when he felt bad. It made him determined not to let him down, so he fought the tiredness and kept replying, assuring him that they could text, if that would help distracting him.

When he awoke around five hours later, it was to another text of Jongin. This one wasn't a hastily chopped message, but one that had evidently been put together thoughtfully.

_ Thanks a lot for enduring my nonsense. I know I look like an idiot, but this really means the world to me. If I'm awkward about it later, please don't take it personally. I know you won't laugh at me, but... it's a little difficult for me. I'll try. _

Chanyeol smiled sleepily, checking his words for spelling errors twice before sending them.

_ Anytime.  
Don't try too hard for me _

Because I can wait. Just for you, I can be patient for once, Chanyeol thought as he snuggled in the blankets for another little nap.

Things were a little different when he met Jongin that night. He had assumed the tacit boy would revert to his old self a little, take a step back. But that didn't appear to be the case, surprisingly. Jongin all but jumped to his feet when he saw Chanyeol skipping down the metal staircase at somewhere around three in the morning.

"Hey," he said with a wry grin as he made it a point to meet Chanyeol's gaze.

"Hey-" he began, and for once even Park Chanyeol was too dumbfounded to talk when lithe arms were wrapped around his torso. Jongin had initiated the embrace with determination, but his grip was light and feathery. Chanyeol gave his best to recover quickly and respond - even if it was difficult to play it cool when Jongin was up this close and he had his nose all but buried in the other's silky, natural-colored hair. The vanilla really was distinct, and there were the berries, too. He could taste them just by being close to him, by thinking of him. What this meant was rather obvious, though Chanyeol didn't plan on getting carried away and do something silly now.

As much as it had seemed like an eternity, it waswere only a couple seconds before Jongin pulled away with a light blush dusting his cheeks.

"I didn’t order anything yetwaited with getting the food," he began, obviously trying hard to be natural himself, "so let's go and line up for food?"

Chanyeol couldn't help but wonder. Wonder about the final taste he was missing. It was like a base, a foundation.

He also wondered what might possibly be going on in Jongin's head. The other appeared to be a little different today, a little more keen on seeking his proximity, a little more... pushy than usual. Which wouldn't mark him as someone even remotely demanding in Chanyeol's book; it was just a little  _ different  _ from usual. The way he looked at him, asked him questions, offered to share his food. It was a little puzzling, but definitely not unwelcome. 

Was he maybe trying to prove his gratefulness towards Chanyeol? Because really, he should tell him not to worry about it. But this really was nice, and Chanyeol felt like a selfish person, but he indulged in the sudden display of affection. Just for this break, he told himself. It would be rude to show him up when he’s trying so hardon his hard tries, anyway.

When their food had been devoured in between the much more tasty words, Chanyeol was about to address the issue - but Jongin was quicker.

"You still have some time left, right? Before you have to go back?"

Chanyeol's eyes blinked up at one of the large, digital clocks far above them. "About ten minutes, but-"

"Wanna see my office?" Jongin blurted out, and after appearing to be almost comfortable for the past minutes, a tinge of sour insecurity was flashing over his expression again. Chanyeol was still mildly confused, but…

"Sure? Why not? I'm curious to see your workplace!"

Jongin laughed weakly, but got to his feet and led the way after they had returned the trays.

"It's not that exciting. It's just a cubicle. But- but the view is really nice up there."

Chanyeol hummed, and merrily speculated over the amount of post-its on Jongin's computer as he followed him to the elevator.    
  
They did have more studios on the upper floors, so the elevator itself wasn't exactly new, though standing inside with Jongin definitely was. Maybe Chanyeol was being ridiculous, but this was the first time he and Jongin had exited the dining room vicinity. This had to mean something, right? That Jongin was willing to give him an actual glimpse of his life?

"I don't like elevators much," Jongin murmured awkwardly, shifting on the balls of his feet as his eyes remained trained on the display showing rising numbers, "but taking the stairs would take forever."

"Yeah, I get that. And it malfunctions all the time, too!"

Jongin looked mildly scared by that and shot him an incredulous look.

"Really?"

Leaning against the mirrored wall, Chanyeol nodded merrily.

"Did it never freeze on you?"

Jongin looked like the mere thought terrified him almost as much as the prospect of going on a date with Baekhyun. Realizing how affected he was, Chanyeol hurried to reassure him.

"Don't worry, it usually just stops for about five seconds and then keeps going. No one ever needed actual rescuing here." He heard Jongin mumble something to himself as he exited the elevator on the 18th floor.

It was extremely dark, and looked just like one would expect an office to look like at three in the morning - deserted, dusty and dead. Though it did look rather clean - it was probably just Chanyeol imagining to taste the dust on his tongue.

A short corridor led to glass doors which already gave them a vague view of the sea of desks spread across the area. A distant light source reached some desks, though Jongin's workplace wasn't in sight yet. The only reason that Chanyeol hadn't crashed into anything yet was the bright moonlight and tiny dots of artificial lights that conveniently filtered in through the big windowfront ahead of them, covering the whole office and a bit of the entrance area.

"Don't you ever switch the lights on?" Chanyeol asked in an unusually quiet voice. There was just something so different about this dark and quiet place, that it would have felt wrong to speak any louder. Or was it the fact that Jongin was so quiet? He was always quiet though, wasn't he?

"It's bright enough- wait."

Chanyeol immediately froze in his steps, only halfway through the corridor.

"What?" he asked worriedly. To his left, Jongin came to a halt, with a lowered gaze. The light was just enough to illuminate his features and bounce off his curls. Even like this, his skin didn't appear white like Chanyeol's probably did. No, even when he was drenched in pale moonlight, Jongin still managed to look warm.

When he finally spoke up, his voice was so quiet that Chanyeol almost missed the words, even though it was dead silent around them.

"There are cameras over there," he whispered. For a second, it was perfectly silent as Chanyeol looked at him in confusion. Just as confusion was turning to actual worry, Jongin turned towards him. Two palms sought his upper arms, clumsily applying pressure. The reason that Chanyeol actually stumbled backwards a little was mostly due to him being surprised and less from actual force.    
  
Without further ado, Jongin leaned in and pressed their lips together. Just like that. And the grey, dusty air was dipped into liquid, creamy vanilla with sprinkled in dots of berries. Uncountable pricks of sourness so subtle that they formed a consistent layer over the sweetness. Not unlike a nightly sky.

There was no doubt that Chanyeol was overwhelmed, mind reeling as it threatened to drown in the sensory overload. Just a moment ago, Jongin had been standing next to him, making Chanyeol worry. Now he was carefully pushing him up against a wall, and somewhere above the vanilla drenching his mind hovered neutral questions like 'how?' or 'why?' - but it would be a shameless lie to say that his body was shell-shocked, just numbly accepting the gesture or maybe even pulling away to talk about this first. No, his lips responded before his brain could catch up with the situation. His senses and body reacted quicker, were more aware, like it was so often the case with Chanyeol. And it felt good. So good.

Chanyeol had kissed both girls and boys before, but there was no doubt that none of their lips could possibly compare to Jongin's. They were warm, just plush enough, and the way they eagerly parted to nip and lightly tug at his bottom lip added a streak of hot intensity to the taste.    
  
There it was, the foreign, almost faint layer of Jongin's taste he'd never quite managed to pinpoint. And getting the full scope was amazing. It was warm, sweet and alluring... Chanyeol actually groaned into the rather chaste kiss, and he felt the fingers twitch on his arms, felt the spark dance over. Before he knew it, he'd slowly but surely turned their positions around, pressing Jongin up against the blank wall instead.

It was  _ sweetness  _ he'd tasted, though not exactly pure sugar. No, the coarse, little crystals people loved to pour in their coffee were far too grainy and intense.

Chanyeol carefully prodded along the seam of Jongin's lips with the tip of his tongue, causing the other's breath to hitch audibly. It was hard to compete with the shudder running through Chanyeol himself, though, when their tongues did touch, and his senses went on haywire.

He'd compare the sweetness to powdered sugar. An even layer of chalky, faint sweetness that worked as a foundation for the distinct vanilla and sour berries.   
A delicious,  _ hot  _ treat.

Chanyeol had trouble stopping himself from devouring Jongin, but he dimly realized that he should probably return to work soon. Every fiber of him wanted to stay here and keep kissing Jongin in the secluded darkness, but that wasn't how it worked. There were still questions lined up waiting to be answered, and they were getting impatient.

He felt Jongin trying to chase after his lips as he began to withdraw with the tiniest sound of discontent. He really was testing him. Chanyeol twisted away just enough to let the moonlight could reflect off Jongin's orbs. The expression in them, the answer to the lingering questions - without a real clue where to start, Chanyeol opened his mouth.

"I... didn't see that one coming."

Jongin huffed out a breathy laugh, and the tension was lifted slightly.

"You don't see anything coming," Jongin whispered, although his sheepish grin took the bite out of his sassy words. "Your tongue sees better than your eyes do, apparently."

Chanyeol blinked.   
  
"What do you mean by that?" he asked cluelessly, and Jongin looked torn between awkward and exasperated.

"I mean that even though I decided to be way more obvious today, you still didn't seem to get it."

"Get what?"

"Me. I- I know I'm not very obvious in my actions, but today I tried really hard, okay?" Jongin said almost defensively. Chanyeol felt the clogs turning, but it was a little hard with the phantom taste still covering everything with a dusty layer of sweetness.

"You. You wanted me to... notice you?" he asked clumsily, and now Jongin actually shoved his shoulder, wearing a fragile facade that did a poor job of concealing his nerves.

"What do  _ you  _ think, after that stunt just now?"

Chanyeol gaped at him, mindlessly rubbing his shoulder.

"That actually hurt," he said almost absently, but Jongin only crossed his arms defiantly.

"You're such a baby. Also, your break should be over by-"

"Kiss it better."

It was Jongin's turn to stare. Chanyeol's reaction had been one thing, but it seemed like this was the verbal confirmation the boy had been waiting for, the one he  _ needed _ .

_ 'You'd want me to?'  _ his eyes seemed to say. When Chanyeol only replied with an expectant look, Jongin ultimately caved in and very slowly brushed his lips against his clothed shoulder.

It was hard not to  _ taste  _ it.

 

* * *

  
  


It was around two in the morning when Chanyeol stood outside the radio station, both hands buried in the pockets of his bulky coat. He did have a day off today, but his sleep cycle wasn't shaken that easily after continuous night shifts - right now, he was wide awake while the world outside the busy building was peacefully sleeping.   
  
Unable to stand still as usual, he shifted from one foot to the other, humming a vanilla song of his favourite artist. How interesting, that Jongin tasted just like these songs. What a strange coincidence.

His train of thought came to a halt when the young man in question exited the building, only five minutes later than their designated time. A shy 'hey' was cut off when Chanyeol stole a quick peck and reached around his shoulders to steer him along.

Jongin still wasn't quite used to public displays of affection (or the display of any affection, for that matter), but he was getting there. Besides, Chanyeol might be chatting lively about the latest mishaps at work, but on the inside, he was a mess as well. Because this was the first time ever he and Jongin had left the radio station together.    
  
He had no doubt that Jongin would relent if he really asked him to meet up, but to Chanyeol, it was obvious that he needed a little more time. And for Jongin, he'd always have time. Now, however, roughly two weeks after their first kiss, he had the permission to tug Jongin into his favourite café to  _ show him something _ , as he'd put it.

"So you know the owner? Do you get discounts?" Jongin jokingly asked as they slipped into a table at the window front. It was close to being deserted at this time, though a few lost souls enjoyed the cozy atmosphere tasting like cinnamon and warmth.

"Not exactly," he dismissed him. "Jongdae is the one baking the goods here. So he always keeps me well-fed."

Jongin was still surprised when this said friend of Chanyeol's personally brought their food. Especially since he hadn't ordered anything.

"There you go, you little cherry tomato," the friendly-looking guy said with a half-exasperated, half-fond smile as he placed a high glass in the middle of the table. Jongin didn't even notice the hot chocolate he  _ had  _ ordered, eyes drawn in by the exotic-looking dessert. It had layers of something that looked like pudding and red fruits.

Chanyeol giddily reached for the elegant ice cream spoon.

"It looks great, doesn't it? Jongdae made it just for me. It took us a whole night to figure it out."  
  
Jongin shot him a quizzical look, and without further ado, Chanyeol dove in the thick layer of powdered sugar coating the fruits, scooped up a generous amount of everything, and offered it to Jongin.

"What is it though?" he asked hesitantly, but upon Chanyeol's expectant expression, he obediently opened his mouth, anyway.   
  
"It's a dessert made of vanilla cream and berries. Currants, raspberries and blackberries, to be precise. Oh, and a sugar-like mixture on top."

He watched Jongin's face trying to take in the exact composition.

"It's a little overwhelming, right?" Chanyeol asked with a wry grin, and Jongin shook his head.

"It's not, it's-... just a little. But not in a bad way. Something about these individual ingredients tastes really unique."

"That's because Jongdae is a genius!" Chanyeol excitedly said, taking a spoonful himself, oblivious of the way Jongin's eyes followed the spoon and lingered on his lips.

"That's your taste, actually. Exactly what I taste when I think about your name."

_ When I think about you _ , Chanyeol thought.

Brown orbs flit up to meet his.

"Jongin,” he said as if confirming it.

Chanyeol made a thoughtful face as he compared the taste of the dessert to the name, just to end up humming in glee.

"I don't even feel a difference, it's perfect…! Though maybe you should say it again. Just to make sure, you know." Jongin looked flustered, but was willing to indulge him.   
  
"Jongin?" he all but asked.   
  
"Hm," Chanyeol hummed, already reaching for a second spoon of dessert, "...and once more."   
  
Jongin leaned his upper body towards him, and for a second, Chanyeol thought Jongin would kiss him. But the other only locked gazes, giving him a perfect view of the deep, chocolatey ocean that were his eyes, filled with shiny, helpless adoration-   
  
"Chanyeol," he whispered.

And Chanyeol grimaced as fresh, juicy tomatoes were dropped on the vanilla cream with a nasty, soggy sound.

"Ugh. Eww. Don't do that again, that was so mean-"

With a perfectly innocent expression, Jongin leaned back in his chair.   
  
"But why, Chanyeol?" he asked with wide eyes and a tilted head, "what could possibly upset you about me saying your name, Chanyeol? Don't you like to hear me say it?  _ Chanyeol _ ?"

He cringed and retaliated, and everything was just so nice like this.

It was 2:34 in the morning, and Chanyeol felt  _ alive _ .

  
  


  
  


 

 


End file.
